Relationship Jokes

Johnny: Madam, would you sleep with me for 1 million? Woman: Why Winston, yes I would. Johnny: What about 10? Woman: What sort of woman do you think I am? Johnny: We have already...

GIRLFRIEND: Why didnt you give me anything for my birthday?BOYFRIEND: You told me to surprise you.

My girlfriend isn't talking to me because apparently I "ruined" her birthday."What did you do?"Nothing. I didn't even know it was her birthday!

Johnny goes up to a girl and says "hey baby what's up?"She says "I have a boyfriend", Johnny says "I have a math test".The girl looks up and says "What's that got to do with...

Every man has been commended by a woman after sex with these same words, "No one has ever made me feel the way you do." Now I wonder who the big liar is if they say that to every...

GIRL: It's about my study dear, my project is the major headache I'm having right now, all my mates have gone ahead of me in the project. I have spent 50k so far in the project,...

GIRL: Sweetie, I want you to treat me the same way South Africa treated the Late Nelson Mandela.BOY: Very good Idea, lets start with 27 years in Prison.

Two days to Valentines Day, Akpos and his girlfriend broke up. This is what happened:GIRLFRIEND: Hey dear, Saturday is Valentines Day.AKPOS: But there is an election on Saturday?...

Ladies, if you are tired of guys who keep on inboxing you silly questions, here are some few tips on how to answer them:Question: "Hey beautiful, what are you busy with?"Answer: "...

Akpos girlfriend found out that she was pregnant. She called Akpos on the phone...GIRLFRIEND: Honey, I've missed my period.AKPOS: Which one? MATHS OR ENGLISH?