Marriage Jokes

Never argue with a woman, just use your brains like this guy. A man went on a night out with his friends the wife is furious and tells the kids that when he comes back they must...

Husband comes home drunk and breaks some plates, vomits and falls down on the floor! Wife pulls him up and cleans everything.Next day when he gets up he expects her to be really...

Are you tired of the single life? Why not challenge God today? Buy the wedding gown and see if God won't supply the groom! If it doesn't work, RENT THE HALL!

The government announced that if you have 5 children your salary will be increased by 50 percent. A man heard the news and said to his wife, "Darling, I have a kid with my...

A conversation between an husband and wife in their bedroom getting ready to have sex.HUSBAND: Dear, you should have this hair shaved a bit.WIFE: [Rolls her eyes] Yea! heard that...

Akpos' wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a long while sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she...

After 15 years of marriage a wife asked her husband to describe her.He looked at her slowly and then said : "A-B-C-D-E-F-G- H-I-J-K"."What does that mean?" she asked."Adorable,...

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband came into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're...

A married couple is driving along the highway doing a steady forty miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband abruptly looks across at her, speaking in a clear...

A man comes back from work at night and heads straight to the bedroom to make love to his wife. He got into the blanket and they made a quick one. When he is done, he goes to the...

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