Marriage Jokes

Akpos' wife was pregnant and the following conversation ensued: WIFE: Darling, guess what? AKPOS: What?WIFE: I went for the scan today and the scan revealed that I'm pregnant...

A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, the man asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she...

A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a full-length mirror taking a hard look at herself."You know, dear," she says, "I look in the mirror...

A very elderly couple appears before a judge. Your honor, we want a divorce.A divorce? asks the judge, How old are you?Im 93. Shes 89.And how long have you been married?65 years....

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day, she comes home to find her...

At bedtime one night, the wife became aware that her husband was touching her in a most unusual manner. He started by running his hand across her shoulders, the small of her back...

HUSBAND: Honey. If I die, what will you do? WIFE: I will stay with my sister. What about you? HUSBAND: I will stay with your sister.

WIFE: I found an aladdin's lamp today.HUSBAND: Wow, what did you ask for?WIFE: I told the genie to increase your brain capacity times ten. HUSBAND: Oh, has he done it? WIFE:...

Armed robbers broke into Akpos' household one day and asked everyone to lie flat. After gathering all they could, they decided to kill everyone one by one. Akpor' gateman was...

A woman was having sex with her lover in her apartment, 20 stories high. Suddenly she heard her husband arrive. She told her lover, stay like a statue and don't move! HUSBAND: Who...

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